And the winner is..

Growing up, I've been a fan of Film and TV award shows. I even imagined myself accepting an award, having my speech and thanking my ABS-CBN family. haha So since it's award-giving season again in the Philippines, I present to you This years Best TV programs and Personalities of my choice. (This is based on My Favorite shows seen from April 2011-to April 2012.** the categories are from PMPC Star Awards for TV)

Best Children Show: n/a
Best Educational Program: Matanglawin
Best Educational Program Host: Kuya Kim
Best Travel Show: MagTV na Atin To!
Best Travel Show Host: Kiko Villalba and Ara Hanesh
Best Reality Program: n/a
Best Lifestyle Show: Us Girls
Best Lifestyle Show Host: Angel Aquino, Cheska Garcia and Iya Villania


Best Morning Show: Umagang Kay Ganda
Best Morning Show Host: Umagand kay Ganda
Best Public Affairs Program: The Bottomline
Best Public Affairs Program Host: Boy Abunda
Best Magazine Show: Kapuso Mo, Jessica Sojo
Best Magazine Show Host: Korina Sanchez (Rated K)
Best Documentary Program: I- witness
Best Public Service Program: Imbestigador
Best Public Service Program Host: Mike Enriquez
Best News Program: Bandila
Best Male News Caster: Ted Failon (TV Patrol)
Best Female News Carter:  Karen Davila (Bandila)

Best Youth- Oriented Program: n/a
Best Horror/Fantasy Program: n/a
Best Talent Search Program: Pilipinas Got Talent
Best Talent Search Program: Luis Manzano and Billy Crawford (PGT)
Best New Male Personality: Luis Abuel (100 days to heaven)
Best New Female Personality: Mutya Orquia (Mutya)

Best Gag Show: LokoMoko High (TV5)
Best Comedy Show:  Gandang Gabi Vice
Best Showbiz-Oriented Show : Juicy (TV5)
Best Male Showbiz-Oriented Show Host: Boy Abunda (The Buzz)
Best Female Showbiz-Oriented Show Host: Bianca Gonzales (E-Live)
Best Celebrity Talk Show: KrisTV
Best Celebrity Talk Show Host: Kris Aquino
Best Variety/ Game Show: Showtime
Best Variety/Game Show Host: Kris Aquino (The Price is Right)
Best Musical Variety Show: Sarah G Live!
Best Male TV host: Luis Manzano (PGT 2)
Best Female TV host: Bianca Gonzales (PBB unlimited)

Best Primetime TV series: Budoy
Best Daytime TV series: Angelito (Batang Ama)
Best Drama-Mini Series: n/a
Best Drama Anthology: Maalaala Mo Kaya

Best Actor in a Comedy or Musical:  n/a
Best Actress in a Comedy or Musical:  Alex Gonzaga (LokoMoko High)
Best Actor in a Drama Series: Gerald Anderson (Budoy)
Best Actress in a Drama Series: Jodi Sta. Maria (100 days to heaven)
Best Actor in a Single Performance by an Actor: Piolo Pascual (Tricycle: Maalaala mo Kaya)
Best Actress in a Single Performance by an Actress: Maricar Reyes (tricycle: Maalaala mo Kaya)

Best Station: ABS-CBN

There you have it Guys. My Complete List of winners in Different Categories. Any Objections, Reactions, Suggestions.. Comment!

Hear the anxious heart

I know. That i was very impulsive about my decisions. Today i have almost been in a situation that i would not want to, a situation where in the first place i wasn't happy, a situation where i will almost be doomed. But i have said yes. and for hours, I make myself believe I've done a great decision. I wasn't happy about it. I said yes, because of hopelessness. I know it's absurd. I prayed, for a second i thought nothing will change now that i committed. But He works in mysterious ways. He know i'm not happy with my decision, so He made his own ways of telling me that. I have been lucky that I can pull out on the decision. It was very mysterious it's almost evening but still someone answered the phone. I'm freaking anxious. about everything. I am not sure what is in store for me. But God just made a miracle tonight. He pulled me out of a jail-like situation. So whatever it is that in stake for me, I will grab it but with a thought. I just hope all is well tomorrow.

Xander

Ninang ko. Paalam po.

I really don't know how to start. I am still in shock. My Ninang Margie just pass away hours ago. This is really sad. She was a good person, not just to me, but i guess for everyone :( and it really really hurts me right now, that i can't even see her for the last time. I will miss you ninang. forever and ever.

Ninang has been my mothers best friend even before i was born. Growing up, I always go to her pwesto in the market because her's and papa's pwesto is just near. Even if my mother is abroad, I felt i have a mother in her. So when i come from school, I visit her as often as i could. She was very generous really. I remember i went to her and told her that it was Papa's birthday and i don't have a gift, She gave me money to buy a gift for Papa. We are almost at every party then. Birthdays in the house, or in our house or in Ninong Carlo Flores' house. But then i started being a teen. I remember those days when she see me and kiss me and says "anak hindi mo na ako dinadaanan sa pwesto ha". and i answered "Wala kasi time ninang" but the truth is, i have the most times in my life. I just didn't visit her because whenever i come to visit her, she'll give me money, or deodorant, and lotion, I don't want her to think I'm abusing her. But there are still times where i can't help it, so i still visit her.

I remembered my celebration party when i passed the exam,I invited her, and She said she will come, but she didn't. But she gave me a lotion and a perfume (Avon ofcourse! hehe) thru my aunt Helen. She was really thoughtful. I can't remember the last time i saw her, but the last moment i could remember is when we went to Baguio back 2010. That was very happy moment for the 3 of us (with mom)..

She was not just my ninang by the way. She was also the ninang of my baby sister, and the ninang to married couple Al and Riza. She was our ninang all the way. And on the draft of my wedding, She was the number 1.

now.She's gone!and Ninang, I will write you a letter, i know you'll read this..

Dear Ninang,

I know I'm too late. But i know i never failed to say I love you, cause i love you really. Thank you for loving me as your own son, thank you for being with us all through out our hardship. I remembered when my father was on jail, you helped us. I remembered when my father was hospitalized, you gave fruits. Thank you for the unconditional love. I will always remember those days i needed a mother you were there. I am thankful that even if you haven't my mom for years, you stayed close as you can  be. I hope i have seen  you before i went here in the middle east. I'm hoping you'll be there on my wedding. it happened very fast. I know you are in Rest. I will pray for you. I love you ninang. I WILL MISS YOU BIGTIME!

Your favorite inaanak as you have said,
Xander

MY NINANG's last like :(

Our last conversation :(

alam na alam mo talaga ang birthday ko!

UDH. I miss!!

The decision leaving the hospital i worked in was never easy. Who says it was easy? Who says it was easy to leave my work friends for almost 3 years?that i love and cherished? Who says it was easy leaving the work almost all Filipino Nurses in the  Philippines are dying for? Who says it was easy leaving the work i always loved and worked hard for? It was never easy. It was heart crushing when i needed to leave UDH. a place i can call my second home.

The decision to go here in Doha was never abrupt. I started planning this together with my sister-in-law last year, October to be specific. If i was really driven that time, I could have gone here earlier, like December. but aside from my family and my friends, I held back because of my Hospital. I worked in the Hospital November of 2009 where i started as an IV therapist completing the required cases. Although i had completed my cases already in the first day, It didn't hinder me to go to the hospital for a week. I envisioned myself working in the hospital. So even i was just an IV therapist then, I also done some volunteer work :)) I remember that day like it was just yesterday. From duty those times were Adrian de Jesus, Elmo Bagaoisan, April Licudo, Annie Mendaros, and Gino Lagmay (who i can say were my firsts professional friends)..then maybe the Supervisors noted that, so one day they offered me the Volunteer contract and the day after i became an official UDH volunteer Nurse.

I didn't know what's with the hospital but i just couldn't absent. I have loved working there. Then it came the time when some volunteers bids goodbye. It was eye-opening that we cannot be volunteers forever. So after six months of Volunteering, I requested for a Certificate, then I received an "accidental" call from the supervisor. After all the hard work, I became a Staff on July 2010.

It was not easy being a Staff Nurse in a Hospital who lacks Nurses. It is an ideal to Multitask. But just being a staff, the title itself, was like a prestige that i could not resist. We cannot remove the haters of course. I don't know if it was bitterness, insecurities, but being a staff in a quite,early time i became the object of ridicule with the other volunteers. But i did not, Never, give them a fart. I worked hard for it. i deserve it.

The time flies very fast that i didn't even notice that i celebrated one year in the Hospital in November 2010.  Then 2 years in 2011. Many volunteers came and go. Many Staff also came and go.

(NOTE: The dates were not all evidenced. That's what my memory serves me. The VICE, just my perception)


I remembered Mr. Tom John de Guzman, the youngest male staff that time who left February of 2010. Replacing him was Ms. Jinky Nepalis

I remembered Ms. Maoime Fernandez, the witty Nurse who left the hospital on March 2010, replacing her was Mr. Arman Mejia.

I remembered Ms. Hanni Villar, the fearless, who left last June 2010, replacing her was yours truly.

I remembered Mr. Leonard Caoile, the furious, who left last June 2010 replacing him is Ms. Angel Castillo

I remembered Ms. April Licudo, who became a staff March 2010 and left the hospital August of the same year, Replacing her was Ms. Ritchelle Fronda (for a week), then Ms. Jossie Bucaloy (for a week) and Ms. Hazel Nievera (for two weeks) then the management just removed Ms. Licudo's item.

 I remembered when Ms. Melody Aquino bids goodbye for a while last August of 2010 and went back early in 2011, and then left indefinitely later of 2011. replacing her was Ms. Donna Bruno.

I remembered Ms. Karen Mercado, who served the hospital for one year as a Volunteer, then another year as a Staff. She left last March of 2011, She was replaced by Ms. Irish Eustaquio.

I remembered Ms. Ana Margarita Romatan, who was In sometimes, and Out often times, but her persistence prevailed and now she got her item of her own.

Then there was Ms. Jinky Nepalis who left for abroad on July 2011, She was replaced by Mr. Jimmy Ignacio.

I remember Arman Mejia, who left that hospital on September 2011, replacing him was Mr. Calvin Valdez

Then there was Ms. Florida Gabriel, who left last October of 2011, She was replaced 6 months after by Mr. Marco Estonillo.

Then the back to back leave of Ms. Herlene Tolentin on November 2011, and Ms. Faye Alvarez, and Ms. Hazel Nievera on December 2011. The items were dissolved.

Then I, left the Hospital 10 days ago. Was relieved by Mr. Adrian de Jesus.

Why did i recall of this. wala lang trip lang haha. No seriously. These are the people who i cherished and who i shared experiences with. These are the people who didn't get afraid to take chances, and answered the what ifs? What if we take our careers to the next level?and for me it's always been better to take the risk than being safe, at all. I don't have a clear vision of what will happen to me here in Doha, but one thing i am proud of,that I WAS NOT A COWARD DOING NEW THINGS. It was just sad that the hospital is getting bigger and wider. It is getting equipped. so i just thought of that as a sacrifice for a better tomorrow!

One hospital friend of mine asked me "naabutan mo si ganito, si ganyan" i answered "yes, yung ano..." It made me realize that i'm getting older as there are many volunteers come and go. I was hungry for professional growth, that's why i decided early.

I miss the People of UGH, The Canteen, The Manongs ang The Manangs, the volunteers, The Supervisors, My colleagues, The Admin People, The Chiefs. The Doctors. There are no regrets staying with the hospital for almost 3 years. It was nice working with great people, and the salary is just secondary.

Thank you for making me feel that i am loved and that i am supported in every decisions i make. To those people i have argued with, Lets all move on from the past and let's start helping each other with prayers. Lets not forget that we have once became a family in UDH. To the volunteers who they felt was unwanted, or bullied, or gone toxic with me. I am Sorry sincerely. I just want you to feel atleast the reality that not all people will like you, not all Supervisors will give you a smile or hug you. It was a training. and thank  you for not taking it seriously, Trabaho lang po.


Till we meet again, Don Amadeo J. Perez Sr. Memorial General Hospital, a.k.a Urdaneta General Hospital, a.k.a Urdaneta District Hospital.. Thanks po, ug,xander  (parang referral lang)

mastering the Doha Map!!

this would be quick. I just want to share you that i did something very amazing today. I went out to apply my license to practice here in Doha. I was really nervous, cause this would be the official day i will be walking out of Doha alone. (i did have a little help from my sister Riza and her friend Kuya Chad)., I went to look for my sister's office. i did have the map on my hand and the map i drew using the google map, and with phone calls by ate Riza. I called her up but she said She was not in her office yet, so i went to look for a restaurant. i walked to see KFC but it was just 8:30 then so it was closed yet, I did come to this Arabian restaurant called White Tower. I expected that a Kabayan would be there and there was none. I BET I'M GONNA PRACTICE MY ENGLISH NOW ey. I stood up to the cashier, there was no pictures of anything aside from it full of burgers,, so i thought it's a fast food chain. I asked "How much is your Burger here?" and the waiter gave me the menu. Oh crap. It's a Restaurant, i sat and ordered. It was 6 riyals for the burger and the water.  What i learned here is you cant always convert everything in to peso cause you can't buy anything, so 6 riyals here is like 6 pesos so it is cheap :) but converted to peso it would be 66 pesos. not bad though.

After eating i went to ate Riza's office and signed the different documents i asked her to print. The original plan is to take a karwa (that is the taxi) to the Supreme Council of Health. I chose to walk however, cause it will help me memorize the City. So i did. I have my whole positive outlook!Upon arriving, i cant see a kabayan anywhere so i asked again (you'll be proud of me cause i asked a lot of times). "where will i process my data flow?" (naks). he answered "on the 12th window". I went there and seen a kabayan waiting too., a couple both Ilokano from Cagayan. I asked "kabayan, san ko iproprocess ito?" she said "Nurse ka din? ay sa online na yan, hindi na sila  tumtanggap ng hard copy". NEGATIVE vibes. I said "sabi kasi sa inaplyan ko  mas maganda raw pag personal". "ilang buwan ba yung visa mo? alam mo baka umuwi ka pa ng pinas kasi matagal processing dito" NEGATIVE again. I said "hindi mabilis lang yan". Whew ang daming negatives babes nung babaeng yun. I went to the teller and asked me to give me my photocopies, i didn't have. There is a Photocopy machine beside so i asked the Pinay again, "pwede ko kaya gamitin yung xerox machine?" she answered "sira ata". I went to the guard i asked him if its working, He said "yeah". I asked "should i operate that on my own?" (nakss!) "yeah" he answered. Naku naman Kabayan ang NEGA mo. hmmm. But i didn't know how to use that so i went back to ate riza again, Imagine that a 30 degrees celcius environment. then i photocopied everything. Kuya Chad accompanied me, buti nalang may sasakyan sya. i went back and gave my papers, I paid 600 riyals, and taran, done in 10 minutes. May pa-online online pa si Kabayan.,

So that's my half day. Will tell you stories again later :p

Finally, I'm here at DOHA!

April 5 2012. Sure was another day for others but an extra ordinary day for me for it was indeed my flight here in DOHA QATAR. It was not new to you that i was invited by my sister in law to visit her here in Doha, but before that i need to take up the Prometric exam (a Qatar licensure exam) in case i would want to work there. So on feb, 17 i took the exam and passed it, after that day, i started filing up and finishing my requirements. As early as the first week of March, I was book to fly on the 5th of April. No one knows yet besides my family and my fiancee. I was really excited and yet a bit sad cause i will be missing my family, friends,and work friends. I didn't keep it a secret for a long time. so on March 20, i posted in FB "15 days.. excited" and tag my sister-in-law as a clue. Some friends got the message, and surprisingly some still didn't get it. After my post, people ask me when is my exact flight? I still kept it a secret. for what reason? I don't know. I just don't want to glamorize it. 

MY BFF (best friend Forever) and MY BSB (best friend since birth

despidida March 29, 2012

i did have a week-long despidida, thanks to my friends. Talagang sineryoso nila na aaraw arawin nila yung pag bisita sa akin, It was nice having great people beside me, and supports me from whatever decisions i make. It just makes me sad for a little bit cause kung kelan naman ako aalis saka naman nabuo uli ang barkada. My hospital friends didn't forget to make me feel special also. Thanks to them. 

april 4 2012

despidida with family april 4, 2012

I filed my indefinite leave one week before April. It was heart-warming cause my Supervisor and I cried together when i told her I'm leaving. I really felt love and appreciated. I ended up working in my hospital for 3 years last March 29. 

So here comes April 5. Ruth, Yson, and Sarah accompanied me to NAIA. Our call time was 3:30 am, and shoot I woke up late. I could've miss my flight haha thanks to Ruth for calling me up. Ruth fetched me together with Mr. P and Mama Claire and dropped us in the nearest Bus stop. We ride a Victory Bus up to Pasay. We arrived in Manila by 9 Am. Upon arriving, we ride on a taxi cab to Mall of Asia. It would be the first for my friend, Yson, so were kinda excited for him. but BAD NEWS, since it was Holy Thursday, the Mall was close. SAD. at least, selected food chains are open for business. We ate at Gerry's grill a heavy brunch. as in heavy. 

While we are dining, I am thinking of how can i print my ticket there was no computer shop open. We searched the whole mall hoping there will be an open computer shop (So imagine me carrying a 5 kilo hand bag, and pulling a 20kilo traveling bag, no escalator or elevator whatsoever). We went to Krispy kreme cause i thought i need to defecate (haha). so i obliged my friends to buy anything for me to go to the CR. I still got problems on how to print my tickets until Geeson came up with a great idea..

"Imposibleng wala silang office dito sa krispy kreme, makiusap ka nalang"

"nahihiya ako eh, ikaw nalang" i answered

So he went to the cashier, and yes, PUMAYAG SILA! OMG!! Meron talaga akong problems asking questions kaya salamat kay Yson.

at 2 pm We arrived at the Ninoy Aquino International Airport Terminal One. So were getting emotional already so i decided to enter na. I wanted to look back, but if i did, I'm gonna cry. I can't be crying! So after i hugged  them, i went directly to the passenger entrance. 

The Independent Xander was on. No one to depend to, just me. after my baggage was x-rayed, I went to pay for my Travel Tax. (thanks to my sister in law, she called me up every now and then), Then i went in QATAR airways. I went directly to the teller and  she said "sir you need to go there (pointing at someone) and let your visa check". 

pag punta ko dun, the man said," where's your paper visa?"

"kailangan ba yun" i answered. "Oo naman" he said.  Buti nalang, i thought of putting that thing to my luggage. I thought it wont be needed anymore, so i opened my luggage at the side. The envelope where i put it was on the bottom of my luggage so i was like removing every other things to see that envelope. EMBARRASSING. after checking my visa, I went back to the checking in of luggage. before it weighs 19.5Kg, after i rearranged everything it went from 19.5 to 20.5kg., so where's that extra kilo came from? haha. Then i went to the entrance of the boarding gates where i need to pay some terminal fee.

Then it came to the immigration, The hardest part of my journey. I can't write everything here though so i am sorry to all of you, i would want to keep it a secret for a while. Imagine i was in an interrogation and asked different things. Sure do my confidence saved me, and the way i speak, i believed i persuaded them. Then the immigration stamped my passport. I went directly to the waiting area and i sat down. I began breathing deeply and being teary-eyed. cause after a tense 20 minutes with the immigration, finally it was done. and it was sinking in, This is really it! So i just waited for the airways staff to call on my seat, and i entered the plane.

I was really excited, it would be the first time for me to ride a plane, but i didn't let my emotion be noticed. I kept calm and as if rode a plane before, but inside of me, i was jumping of joy. I went to see my seat and i am so glad that my sister in law chose a seat on the edge cause i'm claustrophobic. I sent my final message to my family before i switched my phone off. after watching some information on the rules of the airline, i opened the monitor in front of me. I fastened my seat belt, but i wanna go to the comfort room. I didn't know how to unfasten it so i asked the stewardess. i said "how can i unfasten it" she said "oh its cool," and she fastened it very well. Oh crap. the first time i asked a question she didn't understand me. maybe she thought i'm asking her how to fastened my seat belt. haha sabi ko sa sarili ko, i would never ask again".  i figured it out myself.. after going to the CR, i opened this pouch given by the airline which has some socks, toothbrush and the headset. I didn't know where to plug the headset, i didn't bother to ask anymore. haha what i did was, i observed from my left and my right, then i saw they plugged beside our hand lender. So whalla! haha

My girlfriend said that i will expect like a rocky road when taking off so i don't need to panic. It was scary really. but it just took like 15 minutes then all was well. She also said that i will get anything the stewardess has to offer so i did. the first foreign steward asked me "do you like to drink anything" i said "orange juice" after they ask the person beside me and answered "water".  so whatever the person beside me ordered i changed it, when asked again do you want another glass of water, he said "orange juice please".. i ordered Water. haha

There was no Good movies on my monitor so i just watched New Years Eve. ang init sa airplane". The bus i rode to manila is colder. we took off at 6:20 pm. so by 8 pm, here comes the dinner. a foreign stewardess ask me " do you want chicken with rice or %^%#$^*((^^ " i didn't understand the second one, so i said "chicken" haha

I did have some sleep. i was sleep from 10pm to 1:30 am (philippine time). i was awaken by another meal, :) again  the steward ask me "would you like rice with vegetable or fish wih %^*()**^&%" so surprised i said rice and vegetables.haha it was 2 am when i finished eating, after i watched another movie entitled The darkest hour. I was getting a bit excited and nervous cause in just one hour i will be in DOHA. 

we arrived in Doha at 3:30 on my watch as per philippine time and 11:30 pm here in doha. Upon arriving, there is a 3 seattle bus waiting. Again, afraid to ask question so i just went directly inside the bus. i observed very carefully ofcourse that someone beside me is holding a same color of the boarding pass. So then i saw the DOHA ARRIVAL and stop there. I saw the immigration again, so i went there to let my passport be checked. Then the man gestured to go at the edge of his table. Sabi ko sa sarili ko, eto nanaman. But he just took a picture of me and asked me if i came from manila directly. Ayun! nakalagpas din sa wakas! so i waited for my luggage and after getting that, i went outside and i saw my sister and law! yeah, finally after all the shenanigans, Im here at Doha, Qatar.

It was January when i declared to the LORD that i will not spend my birthday in the Philippines this year, I prayed. My birthday is on September and He gave me what i asked him ahead of time. So what i learned, If you really want something, Declare it to our Lord Jesus, He will not just give you what you deserve, He will give you the best of everything. I may have been lucky on my journey on my own, but a piece of advice, don't be afraid to ask questions. cause there is no bad questions, so if you're unsure. just ask..

This is the start of my new Reality, To the people who prayed for me, Maraming Salamat! Shukran!