Just when I gave up all the hopes is when all things are
falling to its places.
It’s ironic as we say never give up on things that you love.
I fought. For the longest time, I did. I tried my best to be the best but maybe
the song was really meant for me, my best wasn’t good enough. I got tired of
fighting for what should be mine. But maybe I just can’t get everything I wanted. When I’m expecting so much more than what is
only given, that is when frustrations are coming out, depressions, sadness.
More upset than usual. More bothered, more worried. Then I gave up. I gave up
on all the hopes that I have. I surrendered, as I surrendered everything to
God. But just when I gave up, everything
just fell back to places.
For some reasons, I used to believe in fate, destiny, luck,
and signs. But after quite some time, I got pessimistic, negative, doubtful. People
always say that Destiny is not a matter of chance but a matter of choice, but I
negate that. I believed that we can’t control what is destined for us. When
something happens, it happens because it was meant to happen. But i didn’t believe
that anymore, maybe people are right, we make our own destiny, there is no such
“destiny” but choices. So I gave up on the belief of fate and destiny. But just when I gave up, God just gives me
something to believe again.
For some reasons, I believed in fairy tales. Contrary to the
people used to think, It’s not Cinderella who was looking for her Prince but Prince
is also looking for a Cinderella. I pictured a life with happy ever after. But I
gave up on my fairy tale dreams, That not everything will be shining,
shimmering, splendid and tales are old as time. I thought I could have it,
maybe I would, but I gave up.. but just when I gave up, God gives me something
to think that maybe all we need is a whole new world, a dashing place I never
knew.
God moves in a mysterious ways. Surrender to him. Be contented on what we
have. And sometimes, it’s not bad to give up, because maybe on giving up, you
will see something that is worth fighting for.
There is no Luck. It is all written. This is fate. And I believe
in fate.
